Vendors: Check your ego, this isn’t about you

Friday, June 5th, 2020

In my decade as a photographer, there’s only one thing I’m tired of: working with vendors who make everything about them.

Now, clearly the disclaimer is that this doesn’t apply to all vendors. I know so many driven, hardworking, passionate wedding vendors that make every single decision in their clients’ interests and they are the best people I know.

But unfortunately that isn’t everybody, and it’s getting really tiring.

Vendors: this might just be another wedding to you, but to this couple, it’s their wedding. Their marriage.

If you have a poor attitude regarding some aspect of the wedding you were carefully chosen to be a part of, get out of this career.

This year I’ve had some pretty crazy interactions with vendors that are so much more centered on themselves than serving their couple.

Y’all: Do. Better.

Being a good vendor at a wedding is not:

  • sticking perfectly to a timeline “no matter what”
  • making the couple micromanage you because you can’t read the room or their needs
  • putting yourself above other vendors in the interest of a good review

Being a good vendor at a wedding is all about:

  • making decisions that benefit the couple before yourself
  • making as many of those decisions as possible, on your own, without having to interrupt the couple’s day
  • preserving the highest level of ease for the couple
  • contributing to the making of important moments for the couple, no matter your personal feelings on it

And more. So much more.

And it’s not about making photos for content or photographs for Instagram or your website or photos that show off what you do.

These are real damn people who have a story that existed before you and will continue to exist after you. This means more to them than it seems to for a lot of vendors.

It should matter as much to you as it does to the couple – because if it doesn’t, you’re in the wrong field.

The wedding industry has a bad reputation of being money-hungry because of meaning and having shallow relationships and intent, and acting in the poor ways above doesn’t help that.

So vendors: shape up, and figure out what you need to do to elevate the experience of throwing a massive party for your couples. Because this isn’t about you, and it’s time more people in the wedding industry sees that.

Imagine what we could change if we all did this together. We could change this industry.

So let’s freaking start.




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  1. […] If you’re trying to be great at everything that day, your images are going to suffer. Be mindful of your ego, and the role that plays in what you believe it’s your job to do.[…]

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